Buried

Under papers at work that is!

So I'm trying to find some joy this afternoon...just enough to get the motivation to get back to work!

I've been chatting with some friends recently about trying harder to stay in contact and know things about each other's lives. These are friends that I love very deeply. I am so encouraged by friendships.

They literally feed my soul.

So I'm looking forward to reuniting with them. Both physically and emotionally and spiritually.

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.



{This weekend I definitely didn't watch 7 episodes of The West Wing on Saturday instead of cleaning house or spending time outside...that would have been such a waste of time!}

{I absolutely did not give up after 13 minutes on the elliptical! Why would I even have bothered going to the gym?}

{And there is no way I watched my dog tear up an entire roll of toilet paper. It is not even possible that I was too lazy to get up and spoil her fun!}

And those are just a few of the things I did not do this past week!

So this is about finding joy. But for the past week I haven't much felt like writing about joy. My cousin lost his 3 month old baby last week. It's startling to see how so much can change so quickly.

We were in Tennessee this weekend for the funeral. A mother's grief is indescribable.

Where does that leave me? Searching for those things that bring me joy...in the middle of great sadness. And if I look deeply enough, they are not that hard to see.

a gifted and caring husband

a family full of love and support

time. to be with the ones I love

Great Weekend!

Friday

Lunch with HK and shopping at The Summit!
bought these:

in Ricepaper (plus eye pencil in Indigo and lip glass in Spring Bean...they are eternal)

And this flower for my hair!

Then on to the BJCC for Wicked! with my mom and friends that might as well be family.

I wish wish wish I could turn back time and see Kristen Chenoweth and Idina Mendel on Broadway!

Saturday

Breakfast at the Original Pancake House (heaven) then goodbyes

Stopped to pick up special beer for John and arrived home to find my Easter present...

a Wii Fit!!!

Sunday

He is risen indeed!

Very much missed my family Easter celebration!


But luckily had some substitute families to spend some time with. And, we were outside a lot so I got some sun!

Talk about finding my joy!

I was recently presented with a question that has been on my mind since the moment I read it. It was a writing prompt from marta. Here was the question (well, list of questions really):

your days are your sonnets. but are they really? are you living your dream or your nightmare? write down your daily routine. now write down your dream daily routine. how many items match up? are you being truly present in your daily life? are you simply going through the motions? list ways to create a more meaningful existence.

That's a lot to think about. What is my dream daily routine? Am I present in my daily life? Do I have a meaningful existence?

When I started thinking about wanting to have children, I really think it was only because it was the next logical step. I routinely say to those that ask that I'm still too selfish to have children. I want my time to be my time.

The more I think about it, the longer time goes on, the more I truly desire to be a mother. I desire for my life to be about something more than me.

So, since I read those questions, I have been thinking about what I want my life to look like and ways that I can create that picture. The word that keeps coming to my mind is joy, loosely defined as a state of happiness. I can tell you, not everything I do brings me joy. Not everything fits into my dream daily routine. I am not always truly present in my daily life.

The purpose of this space is simple. This space will help me identify people, places, things and ideas that bring me joy.

{ella}